Seeing my body for the first time

Sometime in early 2010, I looked in the mirror and really saw my body for the first time.

Of course, it’s not like I’d never looked in a mirror before. In fact, I’ve probably done more than my fair share of that, sitting in front of the mirror scrutinizing every bulge and dimple and zit <insert woeful body flaw here>. But finally, one day stopped in front of the mirror and really saw my body for what it was. I don’t believe I am my body. I’m not a body with a soul inside, but a soul with a body and I finally realized how the two are connected. In that imperfect image of myself, I didn’t see a couple skin blemishes or full thighs, the soft stomach or wide hips. I saw everything I’d been going through reflected in the mirror. I saw the anxiety and stress I’d been carrying around, the lack of rest and the harsh judgment I’d been inflicting on myself.

This body is a manifestation of my life. If I have dark circles under my eyes, it’s because I neglected to get enough sleep. If I’m carrying extra weight, it’s because I didn’t listen to what my body wanted. My poor body is completely at my mercy, a dear friend whom I’ve neglected. It’s my job to take care of it the way it’s taken care of me.

What do you see when you look in the mirror?

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Posted on September 30, 2010, in Body image and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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