Seeing my body for the first time

Sometime in early 2010, I looked in the mirror and really saw my body for the first time.

Of course, it’s not like I’d never looked in a mirror before. In fact, I’ve probably done more than my fair share of that, sitting in front of the mirror scrutinizing every bulge and dimple and zit <insert woeful body flaw here>. But finally, one day stopped in front of the mirror and really saw my body for what it was. I don’t believe I am my body. I’m not a body with a soul inside, but a soul with a body and I finally realized how the two are connected. In that imperfect image of myself, I didn’t see a couple skin blemishes or full thighs, the soft stomach or wide hips. I saw everything I’d been going through reflected in the mirror. I saw the anxiety and stress I’d been carrying around, the lack of rest and the harsh judgment I’d been inflicting on myself.

This body is a manifestation of my life. If I have dark circles under my eyes, it’s because I neglected to get enough sleep. If I’m carrying extra weight, it’s because I didn’t listen to what my body wanted. My poor body is completely at my mercy, a dear friend whom I’ve neglected. It’s my job to take care of it the way it’s taken care of me.

What do you see when you look in the mirror?


Posted on September 30, 2010, in Body image and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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