What a freaking week
I’m relishing the first time I’ve gotten to be be lazy on my couch all week.
I know I’m still getting the hang of blogging and being completely authentic to my readers. (All eight of you reading this…:) so get ready for all the authenticity you can handle.
Some days, I hate my life. Nearly every day this week, I’ve thought about telling my aunt I’m done nannying, and how writing just isn’t happening lately, how my sense of purpose is in the toilet and how I’m sick of being 15 or so pounds above my happy weight. I’m also sick of pretending I’ve got it all together.
To make a really long story short, I’ve actually made progress this week both on the intuitive eating front and in learning to take life as it comes. I’ve started keeping a food/mood journal according to the guidelines on Christie’s blog and I’ve probably been more mindful of my food and my body than I have during the past two years of trying to practice intuitive eating. I’ve also decided that this is where I need to be, taking care of my six cousins and helping my aunt even though it’s the hardest job I’ve ever had. I’ve also felt more like myself than I have in years because I got my no-kid-stick removed (aka, hormonal birth control)
I’ve barely had time to shower this week, let alone write, but I have journaled, and I think that’s what got me through. Good ol’ journal, I could never live without you. Seeing how this is an authenticity blog and all, I’ve decided to kill two flies with one swatter and overlap my blogging and journaling a bit, not only because that’s the only way I’ll get ’em both done, but because my journal is the real me. Handprint Soul is the real me. This is the real me.